Dear 20’s Diaries,
This year has been going great so far, but my anxiety wouldn’t let me enjoy it enough at times. I thought post- graduation anxiety was the worst part but the adulting anxiety seems worse actually. Before we get into that, let’s talk about the great stuff.
Firstly, I’m changing this segment of my blog to my personal diary. Initially the plan for this segment was for it to be a public journal for people in their 20’s and beyond. But I haven’t really gotten any entry YET, so while I wait for the amazing people out there that I know would want to share their stories. Let’s just say I would keep this segment warm for you all.
Also, I used to really enjoy keeping a diary when I was younger. Hopefully, this would a therapeutic outlet for me. I hope this aids in dealing with my anxiety and just connecting with people more. Since I am keeping it real, I’ll let the cat out of the bag by saying that I’m the “anonymous” recovering relationship addict in the last 20 diaries post. Writing that post was really a major step, in accepting and actively dealing with my said addiction. Glad I did it.
Becoming more self-aware is something I have been working very hard on. Accepting my flaws, understanding my actions, feelings and being extremely honest with myself (the toughest part obviously). This is something I highly recommend for anyone that wants to be happier, more confident, secure and possess true self-love. There are so many people out there that get a kick out of manipulating people, know yourself, know your worth. That is really what being self-aware is all about. Being proud of yourself, the skin you are in and your journey. Before I get into a sermon, I would write a post about becoming self-aware.
NOW TO THE LIFE UPDATE
In August, I planned my first event which was called We Just Came To Chill. The concept was a cozy social gathering where people got a chance to connect, let their boundaries down and just have a good time with fun games, drinks and food. The venue was at the newly opened The Rue Cafe on 3, Salt Lake street, Maitama, Abuja (in the same compound with Bamboo house).
Guess whose vision came to became a reality? Mine! With utmost joy, I am proud to say the event went exactly that way and everyone had fun. Grateful for the support of my family, friends, to everyone that came out and actually made it happen. It wouldn’t have been possible without them.
Our next event is in October be sure to follow us on Instagram for updates. We operate on an RSVP basis for now to control the crowd, so turn on your post notifications and give us a follow. Come experience a good time, for sure.
Days leading up to this event were not easy though, I had to change the date like twice or thrice. Had a couple of breakdowns and definitely panic tears. The anxiety was peak. My God is great and did not let me give up. Honestly, this is one of the hugest risks I have taken in my life so far. Even, if it had flopped I know I would have had no regrets because this is something I felt happy doing. However, I still don’t see myself as an event organizer but these are my baby steps.
WJC2 (We Just Came To) is the events curation segment of The20somethings. We aim to organize unique events where people can have a good time and make genuine connections. Based in Abuja
Are you considering doing something that scares the hell out of you? Just do it! Something you have no idea if you would be good at or suck at? Just do it. Because, there is nothing more unsettling than a lifelong “what if?”. Save yourself that drama and just give it a try.
Money, money, money I feel like 85% of what I think about is money related. Not having enough of it, thinking of ways to make more of it thinking of how not to run out of it or waste it and the list is endless. Can anyone else relate? This is one part of adulting I never anticipated, thinking of where money came from. Like I always knew I was going to have to get a job. But did I ever think of how you much I would need to be making to get all the things I need and want? (didn’t really do the Maths there)
So yes, figuring that out has been very stressful, but as the popular saying goes, “I can’t come and kill myself”. I’m just taking things one day at time, I know I would reach there as long as I keep working towards them. This is the plan, and with God on my side all is well. As big of deal money is, people are more important than that. Making sure I still have time to show love, care and just derive joy from other people’s energies is something I never want to lose. Cause honestly that’s major a source of happiness for me.
On the fit fam matter
My update would not be complete without sharing my fitness journey so far. I started this year with just a few fitness goals in mind, so my update would be based on each of them.
1. Learn a sport
Basket ball has always been a sport I have been interested in, especially after watching Love and Basketball. However, my dreams of being a basketball player were crushed in high school. I was auditioning for the basketball team and a ball was passed to me, it was coming towards my face. So in reflex to protect my glasses, I used my hands to block my face. Then the coach screamed at me to never set foot on the basketball court again (cruel end of my b-baller dreams)
However, this year has been for trying new things when it began I started getting basket ball lessons from my friend. I got as far as learning how to shoot from different angles, bounce a ball while walking/jogging and let us just say the rest are “under-construction” till further notice.
2. Workout all through the year
Started working out since December 2017 just so I wouldn’t make fake resolutions I never keep. When this year finally came, I continued with home work outs and basket ball classes. Lucky me I won a free month membership at Rydefit, a spinning studio in Abuja by entering their giveaway. This was a great test of my endurance as spinning is definitely not beans, but I got used it! Luckily, my 1 month membership got extended till 3 months because they saw my dedication (consistency won this for me).
You can check my spin journey on my Instagram. However, by the 2nd month I was already getting tired of it because it became too monotonous for me.
I was finally able to gather all my pennies and pay for a 3-month subscription at a gym. It has been great being back to gym, made me realize how much I love it. Definitely, feeling fitter and happier than I was earlier. Can I see my abs yet? Yeah, kinda on some weekdays and weekends I wake up with some abs lines popping. They are still work in progress but I think my birthday body is almost ready so yayy
In conclusion, I have been able to work out for most of this year besides when I took breaks cause I feel ill or was studying for my professional exams.
On dealing with anxiety
One thing I’ve realized is that anxiety can paralyze and affect anyone. No matter how great things are going in your life, it is possible to still be drowning in anxiety. It doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful or happy for life, it just means you feel stuck sometimes and fear clouds your mind. Take care of your mental health everyone, anyone that tells you Africans don’t have mental health issues are jokers. Seek help, speak about it and protect your energy, you matter.
Personally, my coping mechanisms for anxiety are working out and listening to music. Sometimes, praying and reading the bible really help as well. I also talk to my close friends about it and they always have encouraging and positive words to lift my spirit. I’ll always recommend having a coping mechanism that isn’t too addictive (you know what I mean) if you don’t I mean sex, toxic people or drugs especially.
Lastly, I know I have become very irregular with my posting and honestly I sincerely apologize. I’m still trying to figure out what I want my content to be focused on. Plus work has been really taking up a lot of my time. But don’t worry I would figure this out. We all will and things would get better. I promise!
I need to have a unique closing for my diary entries so I would be testing out different ones till I find the right match. Let me know which you like as well.